


Tucked Away

by MrMurr



Category: Captain America (Movies)
Genre: Drunk Sex, F/M, Forced Bonding, Kidnapping, M/M, Manipulation, Multi, Multiple Penetration, Non-Consensual Groping, Rape, Rape/Non-con Elements, Rough Sex, Sex, Stockholm Syndrome
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-11-09
Updated: 2016-12-25
Packaged: 2018-08-30 01:05:24
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 7
Words: 19,245
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8512834
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MrMurr/pseuds/MrMurr
Summary: Not long after moving to D.C. you meet a charming Steve Rogers working in a local coffee shop.  Things take a turn for the worse when you are confronted by a nameless assailant with a metal arm.





	1. Two Sides of a Coin

**Author's Note:**

> Warning, this work will have graphic depictions of rape and other noncon actions against the reader.

I had lived in D.C. for about 8 months. I had moved there to pursue a career in education. People always asked me “Why D.C.?”, but I never had a good answer. That was just where I felt I should be.  
As bad as teacher’s pay is, assistant teacher’s pay is even worse and that was what I was stuck with. In order to make ends meet, I began working as a barista for a small coffee shop. The work was good, and the pay was enough to ease the burden of paying rent. For the moment, that was all I could ask for.  
One thing I always enjoyed was seeing the families of the kids I worked with come into the shop. It was a nice break from the demanding customers I usually had.  
I was never the type to start up long conversations with customers, they never did seem to hear past the initial “What can I get for you?”. Being shy, I didn’t mind the lack of conversation. The thought of speaking to strangers all day sounded absolutely terrible. It was better to just stick to the minimum and do my job.  
Most customers thought that was perfectly fine with the exception of one. Steve.  
Steve was a daily regular. He was handsome and funny, but I always had to prepare myself for the long chat that always followed his morning coffee. While I told myself it was a nuisance, there was always a part of me that looked forward to seeing him come in. The daily chats we shared made the two of us close acquaintances. Nothing close to friends, but it was nice to see a familiar face.  
On a particularly gloomy day, all at once a grouchy group of customers swarmed the shop. We tried to stay ahead of the crowd, but the orders began to pile up. Mistakes were made and pretty soon grouchy customers turned into angry customers. I did my best to reason with them, but apologies went right over their heads. I wondered how people could get this worked up over coffee.  
As the rush subsided my coworkers and I let out a sigh in unison. As soon as the shop was empty, we began to parody the customers from before.  
As we were laughing, the ring of the doorbell could be heard signaling someone’s entrance. It was Steve. I was relieved that it was him opposed to another angry coffee snob.  
“Hey, (y/n)” he chimed. “Hi, Steve. What can I get for you today?” I asked. “Well” he started, “I’m actually not here for coffee today. Was wondering if you were free this Friday?”. I felt my chest tighten, *Is he asking me out?* I wondered. “I-uh, yah, I’m free” I stuttered. “Great, a friend of mine is throwing a party and I was wondering if you wanted to come?”.  
Parties weren’t usually my thing, especially the parties I assumed Steve must go to. “Oh, I don’t know. That isn’t rea-” “-She would love to” interjected my coworker Amy. “(y/n) just doesn’t have a car, could you pick her up?”. I shot her a dangerous glance.  
Steve looked like his usual happy self. “Of course I can come get you, does 9:00 sound good to you?”. His smile was so charming I don’t think I could have said no. “Y-yah, that’s fine” you agreed. “Great!” Steve exclaimed, slapping his hand on the counter. “I will see you then, (y/n)!”. As quickly as he had walked in, he was gone, and now I had plans with a man that was way out of my league. I found myself both excited and dreading the approach of Friday night.

 

The week passed quickly. Already I was going through my modest wardrobe trying to find something to wear. My clothes consisted of a lot of mid-length dressed and skirts, blouses, and sweaters. Working in an elementary school and having no social life didn’t lead to the most fashionable collection. I eventually picked out a high-waisted black skirt with maroon long sleeve shirt. As soon as I finished my make-up I heard a knock at the front door. *That must be Steve*.  
I couldn’t help the small giggle of excitement that escaped my lips. I had never done something like this. Boys had never come by my house to take me out, it was all foreign territory.  
I opened the door and saw Steve. *God was he beautiful*. “(y/n), you look great. It’s nice to see you out of your work clothes” he praised. Leading me to the car, we made your way to the party. Along the way I asked, “So, Steve. What kind of party is this?”. He gave me a wicked smirk, “Oh you are going to hate me for this, but I’m taking you to a rager”.  
“What!? I don’t think that’s a good idea. It’s really not my scene” I said. “No, no no. It will be fine, you’ve got me. It will be fun, I promise” his reassurance eased my nerves, but I still felt hesitant to go. “Okay, just don’t forget about me”. He scoughed, “I don’t think I could do that if I tried”.

 

Walking into the building was the most terrifying thing I had done. Each step felt like I was wearing shoes made of brick.  
Making our way inside, a swarm of people came to greet Steve. I tried to keep an eye on where he was, but he quickly disappeared into a sea of drunkards.  
Unsure of how to get home, I just found an empty corner of the room and waited. I resented Steve a little for losing me so soon. As the hours went by I were offered drink after drink from kind strangers. I had begun to feel dizzy, so I made my way towards a free spot on the couch.  
Slumping into the cushions, I was offered yet another drink. At this point I were too far gone to refuse. As I sat there hoping to come across Steve, I met eyes with a gloomy, scruffy looking figure posted against the wall drinking from a personal bottle of vodka.  
He didn’t seem like he was enjoying himself either. *He was probably ditched just like I was*. Seeing him sway, I convinced myself to put down my glass. Tonight was not the night I was going to get that drunk.  
All of a sudden I felt sick. The combination of too much alcohol, loud music, and an array of smokes had me desperate to find a bathroom. On my way I finally ran into Steve who could tell I was feeling sick. He guided me towards a room in the back, away from all the noise.  
“(y/n) I am so sorry, I just got held up. Are you feeling okay?” he had a worried look all over his face. “I’m fine, really. Just a little dizzy” I could tell that he felt guilty, but I just needed a moment alone. “Well, you just stay in here until you feel better. Come and find me if you need to go home” he gave my shoulders a reassuring squeeze and left the room.  
The longer I sat there the more drunk I felt. *I knew this would be a bad idea*. Feeling another wave of nausea, I moved into the bathroom. Luckily there was one in the room, I wasn’t up to the challenge of rejoining the party.  
I rinsed my face. The cold water felt so good.  
I closed my eyes for a minute, just breathing. Hearing a crash outside the bathroom I jumped. *Was that from outside?*. My body stiffened when I saw the gloomy man from before attempting to pick himself up off the floor. Unsure of what to do I called out to him. “Um, a-are you okay? Do you need me to go get someone?”.  
He didn’t answer. He just laid there which made me nervous. The bottle from before was now completely empty. When he didn’t show any signs of moving, I made my way to step over him. When I did he shot up. Slumping in the doorway, he blocked my only way out.  
Taking a cautious step towards him, I tried to slip under his arm. He really needed help. *Steve would know what to do*.  
As I was ducking under him, a pair of bright blue eyes shot open. He straightened up, effectively restricting my access to the door. The way he towered over me was not something I would forget. His eyes locked on to mine, and the corner of his mouth raised in amusement. I made another attempt to get past him, but this time he deliberately blocked my path.  
I felt a rush of panic. “Are you feeling okay? We s-should go get Steve. He knows what to do better than I do” I pressed. He let out a half-hearted laugh, “We really don’t need Steve here Doll” he purred, sending a shiver up my spine.  
He turned around and closed the door. I heard it lock with a sickening click. He began to step towards me. I backed away, but met the wall all too soon. He reached out, grabbing my shoulders and pressing me into the wall. With one hand, he roughly grabbed a fist full of my hair. Yanking my head to the side, he began to lavish my neck with sloppy kisses. The smell of vodka was overpowering.  
In my own state of dizziness, I pushed against his chest. With all his weight leaning onto me, he barely budged. “P-please stop. I don’t want to do this” my voice sounded defeated.  
He began to grinding his hips against mine. That was when the real panic set in. I struggled more and more, but he barely even acknowledged me.  
He moved one knee in between my thighs, pressing up and in to spread my legs. I let out a scream, but no one could hear over the sound of the music on the other room. He laughed again “You are going to need to do better than that if you want someone to come rescue you, Doll”. I felt tears well up in my eyes, I simply did not have the strength to get him off me.  
He continued press into me and I became aware of the growing bulge in his pants. His hands began to wander up and down my body, pinching and pulling.  
One hand moved to grip tightly around my neck, holding me in place. I struggled against the fabric of his shirt and realized that his left arm was made of metal. The initial shock made me pause for a moment. *A metal arm? How?*. He must have noticed my look of surprise, it made him angry.  
Changing positions he swung me around. Switching his hand to the back of my neck he bent me over the sink, trapping me there against his body. I could feel bruises begin to rise where ever he touched me. “Get off me!” I cried. Now with both hands free he began to pull at my clothes.  
First, he grabbed my shirt, lifting it up just enough to expose my breasts. He reached under me and began the painful assault on my nipples, tugging and twisting. I fought to remove his hands and ease the pressure. Still grinding against my ass, he leaned further into me, kissing and biting along my back.  
My crying was uncontrollable now, but it didn’t seem to make any difference to him.  
Next, he grabbed the hem of my skirt. I reached back trying to hold it down, but he raised it with the same ease of his other actions. “No, Stop! Please, let me go!”. I squirmed against him, but he held me still.  
He let out a growl upon seeing my ass, now an angry shade of pink from the friction of his pants. With a crack his hand came down and slapped my ass. I let out a gasp of pain and surprise which only amused him more.  
He reached around my front and began to paw at my pussy. I let out another scream “Stop! Stop, please!”. He released a breathy moan, “Shit, Doll. You’re really getting me worked up”.  
I felt his hands grip my hips and curl under my panties. He dragged them down so slowly, relishing the fact that he was in total control of me. I just continued to cry as I felt my underwear stop mid-thigh. His metal hand returned to stroke my now bare clit. It was cold and I jumped at his touch.  
His flesh hand moved up and down my back, leaving bright red streaks from his nails scratching against my skin. His hand disappeared for a moment and I heard the zip of his fly. He spat into his hand and began to pump his cock. Every now and then I could feel it bump against me.  
He shifted behind me, placing one hand on my hip he guided himself towards my entrance. “Don’t, Don’t put it in!” I begged.  
To my relief it seemed like he was having trouble finding himself. I did my best to tuck my hips under in an attempt to keep it that way. He stumbled, proving how drunk he was. Instead of giving up he simply changed tactics.  
Pressing my legs together he just rubbed himself against my folds. In his state that seemed to be enough. His hands returned to my breasts, using them to support his sloppy thrusts. It was impossible to ignore. I tried to distance myself from what was happening, but every time he would pull me back in with a slap. He didn’t seem completely satisfied unless he had all my attention.  
His pace began to quicken, I could tell he was close. A mixture of moans and curses began to fall from him lips. His hips were bucking frantically, and with a final harsh thrust he curled over and sunk his teeth deep into my neck. I let out another scream from the pain.  
I could feel his cum sliding down my legs. With a breathy snicker he pushed his way off me and proceeded to tuck himself beck into his pants. “I wouldn’t bother trying to tell anybody. Just wait here for a few minutes and get yourself together”.  
I slumped to the floor still in a state of shock.  
He gave me a victorious look before moving towards the door and rejoining the others outside.  
A wave of fresh tears pooled in my eyes. All I could do was sob. I could still feel his hands ghosting all over my body, I wondered if I would ever get rid of the feeling.  
Grabbing a towel I started to wipe away any evidence of him. I picked myself up and adjusted my clothes, I couldn’t bring myself to look in the mirror. Not wanting to join the others, I stayed in the bedroom for a while.  
Eventually I decided to go find Steve. The night had died down so he was much easier to find. “Hey, (y/n). Are you feeling any better?” he asked. All I could think to say was “I’m tired”. He wrapped his arms around me and said “Alright then, let’s get you back to your place”. He felt so warm and safe, I didn’t want him to let me go.  
The drive back was quiet, he gave me a light kiss on the cheek before letting me out. “I’m going to make it up to you. Tonight was shit, but next time it’s just going to be you and me”. He cracked a confident smile which I did my best to return. Once I had made my way inside he drove off.  
I went straight to bed. I changed out of my soiled clothes and buried myself deep in the pillows.


	2. Naming your Demons

I woke up the next morning sore and aching.  It took me a moment to realize that the events from last night weren’t just a perverted nightmare.

Looking down at myself I noticed the spotting bruises across my skin.  I did my best to push the thoughts away, but they kept creeping back into my mind.  I decided to hop into the shower, hoping to wash any trace of that man off of me. 

Stuff like this wasn’t supposed to happen to people like me.

I kept going over the assault in my head.  I felt dirty and used.  The only consolidation was that he never managed to get inside me.  I don’t know what I would have done had I lost my virginity to a man like that. 

After an unknown amount of time, I emerged from the bathroom.  All I wanted to do was sleep and forget about everything.  I made my way into the kitchen and began to make breakfast.  I didn’t have the energy to cook so I settled for cereal and a piece of toast.  I sat there absentmindedly munching until I heard a buzz from my phone.

It was Steve.

I didn’t want to pick up the phone.  Unsure of my ability to stay composed, I took a deep breath before answering.  “(y/n), I didn’t think you were going to pick up.  “How are you feeling?” he asked.  I felt tears bubble in my eyes.  How could the two men in my life be so different?  Steve was so kind and assuring, but I kept thinking about the man from last night. “(y/n)?” he repeated.

“Oh, sorry.  I guess I’m still recovering from last night-” my voice cracked into a sob that Steve definitely heard.  “(y/n), are you at home? I’m coming over” he stated. “No, Steve, you don’t need to do that.  I fine, really” I pleaded.  There wasn’t anything for me to do.  Once Steve had his mind set on something it stayed there. He hung up in a hurry.  All I did was sit and try to think of a lie to tell Steve.

He was so good, knowing what happened to me would have killed him.  He would never forgive himself for bringing me there and leaving me alone.

When the doorbell rang, my stomach dropped. I still didn’t know what I was going to tell him.

I shuffled to the door and let him in.  He seemed out of breath, * _Did he run over here?_ *. He had concern painted all over his face, I’m sure he could tell I had been crying from my puffy eyes.  “What happened (y/n)?”  The look he gave me shattered what little composure I had.  He gently guided me over towards the couch.

As soon as we sat down he pulled me into his chest and stroked my back.  I wept for a while as he soothed me.  After a moment he lifted my head “You need to tell me what’s going on”.  * _How could I tell him? Where would I even start?_ *.

“It’s about last night” I began.  I could feel his shoulders tense.  “What? What happened last night?” his voice was increasingly anxious.  “I-it was after you left me in the bedroom.  Somebody came in- I don’t know who it was- but h-he” I broke off in to another sob.  “He did what!?” Steve asked, angry and hurt. He understood what I was telling him, but he needed to hear me say it.  “He touched me, and forced himself on me.  I-I didn’t know what to do, no one could hear us”, I couldn’t bring myself to look Steve in the eye. That was all I told him, I didn’t know how to explain the stranger’s metal arm or his incredible strength.

“This is my fault, I should never have left you there by yourself” his fists clenched into a tight ball.  I had enough to worry about, I didn’t want his guilt.

We stayed there for a few minutes just holding each other.  Hearing his heartbeat was enough to calm my nerves. “Do you want to go away for a while?” Steve invited quietly.  I was surprised, “Go away? Like on vacation?”. “Yah, just you and me.  We can go and just be alone for a couple of days” his offer was so tempting, but I wasn’t sure about spending that much time alone with _anyone_.  “It will be good for you to get out of the city. Let yourself recover, (y/n)” he pushed.

I felt myself give in, “Alright, maybe just for a couple days”.  His face lit up.  “Fantastic!” he said, handing me my phone.  “Call into work, tell them you aren’t coming in this week”.  “So soon!?” I questioned.  “Yes!  What good are you going to be in this state? You don’t need to push yourself so hard” his stubbornness while annoying did lift my spirits. He gave me another tight squeeze before getting up.

“I will pick you up tomorrow at noon”.  He paced a tender kiss on my cheek before walking to the door.  As he left I saw a flicker of guilt cross his face. It wasn’t the same from before, * _There must be something else on his mind_ *.

 

I didn’t start to pack until late the next morning, a decision I soon regretted.  I wished I had talked to Steve about where we were going, I didn’t know what I would need.  Before I knew it Steve was already at my door, I quickly scrambled together the last of my things and joined him outside.

We hopped into his car and began our drive away from the city.  “Steve, what exactly are we going to be doing?” I inquired.  “Whatever it takes to _heal_ ” he responded simply.

We stopped at a gas station just outside the city.  “I’m gonna need some coffee before we start this drive” he joked “Just wait here”. He returned with two cups of the worst coffee I had ever tasted.  “God, this is terrible” I said, he laughed with me.  The swaying of the car lulled me into sleep before I could even finish my cup.  I guess I didn’t realize how tired I was. That really was terrible coffee.

When I woke, we were deep into the country side. The drive was beautiful, the leaves were beginning to change color giving the road a warm familiar feeling.  I had no idea where we were, but I didn’t care.  I was just glad to be away from it all.

 

After another hour or so we turned into a long driveway.  This whole place seemed like a tangled mess of abandoned roads.  I was glad not to be the one driving.

We approached a little clearing and at its center was an old cottage home. I was eager to get out of the car and stretch my legs.  “This place is amazing, Steve” I gawked.  “Yah, it is. I haven’t been here for a while” he sighed.  Gathering up our things we made our way into the house.

“Just leave the bags by the couch, we can move them later” Steve called out.  I began to explore the first story, it was fully furnished and clean, which surprised me.  “I’m going to run outside and grab some wood.  Do you want to start making some dinner?” he asked.  I nodded and began to learn my way around the kitchen. 

I heard the door open and watched Steve come in with an armful of kindling. He disappeared for a moment into the living room.  Leaving the food on the counter to cool for a moment, I went out in search of Steve.  “Hey, the foods ready.  Where are you?”.

No answer.

I moved further into the living room then heard a heavy pair of footsteps behind me, “There you a-”.  I dropped the pan I was drying.  It was the man from the party.

I stood for a moment frozen. * _How could he be here?_ *.  He took a step towards me and I let out a scream, “Steve!”.  I picked up the pan and held it out to defend myself.  “Steve!” I called out again.  This time he rushed through the door, I ran to him immediately.  The other man made no move to approach us.  Hiding behind Steve I whispered “That’s him, that’s the man who…”.

Steve let out a remorseful sigh, “I know who he is”.  My eyes shot up at him, the thought had crossed my mind that Steve could know my assailant, but what was he doing _here_? “Bucky, come here” he gestured for the other man to approach.

“What is this Steve? Some kind of therapy session?” I felt betrayed. I had opened up to him about the most traumatic experience of my life and he does _this?_   Steve grabbed my arm and pulled me in front of him, still holding me close to his side. “(y/n), this is Bucky, he’s my friend.  I know you’re scared, but he’s not going to hurt you. I promise”  I couldn’t believe the words he was saying.

As the other man, Bucky, approached I began to squirm against Steve’s hold.  Bucky didn’t seem _as_ imposing as the night before.  It was like he was purposefully trying to make himself as small as possible.

I was confused and scared.  I didn’t know why Steve thought I was ready to confront Bucky.

“What are we doing here, Steve!?” I raised my voice. “We…You are here for _him_ ”. 

My body went cold, * _What did he mean by that?_ *.  Steve turned me to face him.  “(y/n) I’m so sorry.  He needs someone, I wish he hadn’t picked you, but I have to help him. You don’t see it yet, but he is a good man, he will take care of you”.  It was like he was speaking in a different language.

He began to push me forward towards Bucky, casting me into the other man’s arms.  I protested, “I don’t understand! Please, let me go” pushing against Bucky’s broad chest was as unsuccessful as it had been before.  “You can’t leave me here with him, Please!” I cried. “(y/n) he needs _you_ to help him heal, he needs someone to love him” Steve said trying to console me.

The more he tried to explain the more frantic I became.  “Stop fighting, it isn’t worth it” he said, “The two of you are going to go into that room, I will stay out here. Don’t worry (y/n) I will _not_ let him hurt you” the last piece was a promise to me as well as Bucky. The two men exchanged a nod and them Bucky began to lead us towards the other room.  

I kicked and screamed, “You can’t just give me away! Steve!”.  He wouldn’t look at me, he knew it was wrong and that crushed me.  As Bucky dragged me into the other room I tried to plead with him “You don’t need to do this, it doesn’t have to be like last time.  Please let me go home!”. 

It already wasn’t the same.  He wasn’t as coldhearted. I could tell that there was a part of him that wished it could be different.

He threw me on the bed and turned to close the door.  I got one last look at Steve, praying that he would change his mind and save me.  He just sat there and I felt myself start to give up.

I was alone in the room with Bucky.  I just sat on the edge of the bed shaking in fear.  He stood at the door for a moment before walking up to me.  He crouched down so that his face met mine, his arms caged me in on either side.

His face was a little pained.  He gave me a sorry look as he leaned in and started to kiss me.  I felt powerless. He stood up and deepened the kiss, pushing me down on the bed.  Even as he crawled on top of me I couldn’t bring myself to move.  “You are beautiful, (y/n)” he whispered.

His hands caressed my curves. Finally he broke the kiss to remove his shirt. This was the first good look I had at his metal arm.  My stomach curled when I looked at the marbled scarring across his shoulder, * _How did this happen to him?*_.

His hands reached under my shirt, lifting it over my head.  Terror struck my mind and for a moment I felt clear. * _No, I am not going to let him do this to me. I am not going to do nothing_ *. I don’t know where the sudden burst of courage came from, but I used it as best I could.  I pushed his hands away from me and tried to distance myself.

His eyes lit up.  Immediately his disposition changed. Grabbing both my hands in one of his he raised my arms above my head.  With his free hand he reached behind my back to undo the clasp of my bra.  Casting it to the side, he went to work kissing my collarbone. Slowly moving down to take one breast in his mouth.  I could feel him sucking and his tongue flicking against my nipple. I let out a small cry.  He moved on to the other, taking his metal hand to continue squeezing the first.  The coolness of his hand had me desperate to get away from his touch.

“Stop!” I gasped. “Quit fighting me, I promise it will feel good” he said pulling down my skirt. I was left in nothing but my panties.  He retreated for a moment to take in the sight.  I covered my breasts and looked away, I couldn’t just watch him stare at me.  My cheeks flushed with color.

“Shit, Doll.  I can’t wait to dig into you.  By the time we are finished, I will have you screaming my name” he growled.  This was too close. Thing were going too far, mush farther than before.  I could only think to call out to Steve again, “Please, please Steve! I don’t want to do this Steve!”.  I resented myself for calling to him, he had gotten me into this mess, but I had no one else.

Tears were streaming from my face, I was becoming hysterical.  Bucky didn’t even bother to try and slip off my panties. Grabbing onto the hem he ripped them clear off.  I was completely exposed to him.

His metal hand found a place on my neck, and gave it a light press. His other hand went to work freeing his throbbing cock. He just pumped himself for a moment, looking directly into my eyes.

Grabbing onto my hips he pulled me closer. I could feel him pressed against my pussy.  His size was intimidating, I felt another wave of panic.  I reached down and tried to push his hips away from mine, but he didn’t budge.

* _This is it.  This is how I would lose my virginity…_ *

He spat into his hand and trailed his fingers along my folds. He rubbed little circles around my clit while stroking himself.  With all other options exhausted, all I could think to say was the truth.

“Please, I-I haven’t done this before…”  I whispered, I wouldn’t have known whether or not he heard me if it weren’t for the sudden pause.  “You mean to tell me you are a virgin?” he asked.  I nodded looking away.  I hoped that would change his mind, but It didn’t. “Remind me to thank Steve later” was all he said.

He lined himself up with my entrance and I began to writhe beneath him.  He placed a heavy hand on my chest to stop my movements.  He locked eyes with me and dawned a sinister smile. He shifted his hips forward and I felt the pressure of his cock against me.  “It h-hurts. Ah! Please…” he just smiled down on me.

With a quick thrust he was inside.  I let out a scream of pain as he tore through me.

He pressed into me deeper and deeper.  I let out gasps of pain as I tried to accommodate his size.  My walls were fluttering around him in an attempt to adjust.  Too soon he began to move in slow, deep thrusts.  Every time he entered me I could feel new tears pricking at my eyes.

“I love seeing you like this” he groaned. He leaned over and kissed me roughly. I let out a moan that surprised the both of us.

“That’s better” he cooed. He reached a hand down and began to play with my clit. The pain was so real that I welcomed the pleasure from his touch. I was ashamed that it felt good, but the constant fullness and friction was beginning to make my heat pool.  I did my best to stay quiet, I didn’t want him to know.

He started to pick up speed, the sheer force behind his thrusts were quickly pushing me over the edge.  His dark hair began to stick to his forehead, and low grunts continued to escape his lips.

I was so close it hurt, the only thing that stopped me from falling to pieces was my resolve.  I would not break for him.  But my will could only hold out so long against his relentless assault on my body. I felt seconds away from finishing and I could no longer control my voice.  I let out little whimpers every time he entered me, the victory only egged him on.

He cupped my face with his calloused hands and in the smoothest voice said “It’s okay, let it go”.  I couldn’t even form a complete sentence so I just looked into his blue eyes and felt myself fall apart. “No, n-I don’t…Ah! Stop…”.

My climax hit me like a brick.  I let out a silent scream and he continued to ride me through my orgasm.  I gripped onto his arms for support, the moment seemed to last forever.  He kissed me all over and for an instant, I forgot what was happening.  My walls clenched around his length, milking out a deep moan from Bucky.

To my torment, that did little to slow him down.  He continued to pound into my oversensitive pussy, the feeling was too much.  “Ah! Bucky please, s-slow down. I-it’s too much, I can’t-”.  My hips were bucking frantically, anything to ease myself from the over-stimulation.

Bracing the two of us with his metal arm, he wrapped his flash arm around my waist and pressed me flush against his chest.  I could barely move he was holding me so tightly. His thrusts became sporadic, but lost none of their intensity. “Oh, fuck, (y/n)” he groaned.

“W-wait” I said.  “You can’t cum inside”.  He let out a laugh, “Oh, I can’t?”. He pressed his head into the crook of my neck and moaned again.   I felt his seed spill into me, and was completely defeated.  He stayed inside me for a minute catching his breath.  With all his weight on me I felt smothered.

He leaned back and pulled out of me with a wet pop. He quickly cleaned himself off with a corner of the bed sheet and redressed himself.

I sat up and watched him.  I winced from my aching pussy, earning a smirk from Bucky. He paced over, grabbed my throat and planted another harsh kiss.  “You had better get used to that, (y/n)”.

I felt used and worthless.  I didn’t see the man that Steve saw, and I wasn’t sure I ever would.

Bucky opened the door and Steve’s eyes looked up.  He hadn’t moved from the place we left him.  Bucky made his way to join him “I gotta say Steve, you did a good job. I haven’t had a lay that good in a while” he laughed. Steve angrily ignored his comment.

“Oh, and did you know she was a virgin when you brought her here?” he added. Steve’s head whipped up to look at Bucky and towards the room.  “Guess not” he chuckled and made his way outside.

After a period of silence Steve got up and made his way to check on me. “(y/n)?” he called.

He entered the room while I was gathering the scattered remains of my clothes.  My legs were still wobbly, so his sudden entrance startled me enough to lose my balance and fall on the floor. Steve immediately rushed to my side.  “(y/n), please.  I’m so sorry” he started.  “You’ve said that Steve!” I snapped back.

“He didn’t used to be like this, he used to be good. I just want my friend back” he said remorsefully.  I began to sob again, weakly batting at his chest.  I was so angry and so tired.  I didn’t even feel like I had the strength to be angry with him.

Helplessness was becoming an all too familiar feeling.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How far is Steve willing to go to bring back his old friend?


	3. Standing Ground

I barely slept that night, how could I?  Even though I was mentally and physically exhausted, my mind was racing for hours.  I had to think.  * _How do I get out of here? I don’t even know where I am.  What is the story behind Steve and Bucky?_ *.

I wondered what it was like for Steve to be so dependent on Bucky to let things go this far? How much Steve must need him to disregard all empathy. He genuinely seemed like a moral person, I suppose things were just different when it came to Bucky.

Laying on my side I watched light begin to filter through the window.  I didn’t start to move until it was completely light out.

I heard a cautious knock on the door.  * _It must be Steve coming to deliver more shallow apologies_ *.  I was surprised to see Bucky timidly poke his head through the doorway.  I stiffened immediately, pulling the covers tightly around my head. 

“(y/n)?” he asked quietly.  I didn’t respond.  My stomach was bubbling with a mixture of fear and rage.  I wasn’t sure which would come out if I started talking.  I heard his foots steps coming closer. “(y/n)?” he repeated.

I felt the bed shift under new weight.  He was sitting on the low corner of the mattress, * _What does he want **now**?_ *.  I took a breath and cautiously ventured out of the blankets.  When I looked up he was playing with his hands, there was a guilty look on his face. * _Good_ *.

“Why are you here?” I managed to say with the most assertion I could muster.  He stayed quiet. It was like he was two different people.  This side of him was remorseful and contrite, not the manipulative aggressor I knew too well. I didn’t know how anyone could live with the disparity, but his turmoil gave me a sense of pleasure.

* _He doesn’t have the right to be upset.  He’s just sitting there, it’s pitiful…_ *

“What do you want!? Do you need another quick fuck!?” I barked, he winced at my words.  His reaction only added to my outburst.  “You think that you can just come in here looking sorry and have me what, forgive you? You and Steve really make quite the pair” I glared. “Stop…” he said.  I was livid, by now I was fully out of bed, inching closer and closer through my confrontation.  “Stop? You want _me_ to fucking stop!?”, I was right in front of him now.  Emboldened by my anger I shoved him.

Hit eyes shot up from the floor, “Watch it…” he growled.  “Or what? You’re going to hurt me? Rape me? We’ve been there already” I said shoving him again. His eyes were growing dangerously dark, I could tell he was struggling to control himself.

A part of me was begging for him to snap, I would rather go down fighting than give up. Our eyes bore into each other’s.  With a ‘humph’ I turned on my heel and left the room, leaving Bucky alone fuming.

That was my victory.  I felt a warm sense of gratification fill my body.  I couldn’t beat them by strength, but I could make it hell for them to keep me here.  I would just have to fortify myself with the little victories I could manage.  For now that would be enough.

I marched into the kitchen, the skirmish with Bucky had left me aching for some food. I wolfed down a quick breakfast, doing my best to maintain my confidence in the case of another conflict.  Bucky passed by, but didn’t speak.  I hoped he would keep his distance for at least a little while.

As I began to clean up, Steve joined me in the kitchen. I did my best to appear unbothered.

“We need to talk, (y/n)” he started, but I ignored him. “If you would just let me explain, maybe it will make things easier”.  When I continued to be unresponsive, he let out a sigh and led me into the living room.  We sat down on the couch for what I expected to be a very one-sided conversation.

Over the next hour Steve told me everything. I couldn’t believe him, I _didn’t_ believe him, but he spoke with such clarity that I couldn’t help but be drawn in.

He told me about World War 2, the serum, losing Bucky-losing Peggy, all the way up to finding his friend 70 years into the future.  I now understood why they were so important to each other, but that did little to weaken my resentment.  I had my answer to how Bucky could change into a completely different in an instant; he was in some sense, two different people fighting for control.  He was struggling to free himself from the ‘Winter Soldier’.

I knew Steve said what he did in order to make me more compliant.  He wanted me to see Bucky as the tormented soldier, but that’s not all he was.

Pitied the both of them, but I would not forgive.

After finishing his story, Steve looked up at me expectantly.  “Steve, I don’t know what you want me to say…”. His face flushed with frustration.

“I-I don’t know, I just thought that if he had someone to hold onto he would get better.  He needed someone to bring him back, I just wasn’t enough…” he said dejected. “He needs love.  You were so kind and patient, I though…”, trailing off, he never finished his sentence.  He seemed like we was starting to realize how absurd his plan was.

“But why did it have to go like this?  Why am I trapped out here in the middle of nowhere?  Why couldn’t you just ask?”  I was on the edge of crying.  “I wanted to, (y/n), I really did want to.  I wasn’t supposed to happen this way”, he choked out.

“You two were supposed to meet at the house party. But I lost both of you, and then _he_ found you-I swear I didn’t know what happened until you told me.  You would have never agreed after that…”. He sniffled and wiped his eyes on his sleeve.

I felt another bitter tang of compassion.  I tried to pull myself together.  I wondered where we would be now had things gone right.

I had nothing to say to him. 

Hearing a shift in the corner, our heads turned to find Bucky.  He had been listening to us, I don’t know for how long.  He had curled into himself, like this, he reminded me of Steve.  They were both shamed of what they had done, but I was still unsure of what they were going to _do_.  I was relieved that Bucky had heard us and not the Winter Soldier.

Eventually Bucky looked at me, “I’m sorry” he said.  It was amazing how quickly those two words were able to send me into a fit.

“That’s enough!” I shouted.  The two men straightened up in surprise.  “If I hear either of you say that you’re sorry one more time, I swear to God!”,  I’d had it with their meaningless apologies. They weren’t meant for me, only to sooth their own conscience.

Steve injected “(y/n) you can’t blame him, I got yo-” “I can and I do.  I blame both of you” I interrupted.  “There is something wrong with _you_ and my being here isn’t going to change that”. Steve looked like he was going to say something, but Bucky beat him to it, “Steve, I did do it”.  He cautiously walked over and took a seat on the couch next to me.

Sitting between the two of them I felt trapped and they knew it.  I was losing my nerve.  Bucky leaned in and placed a hand tenderly on my thigh.  “I want you to forgive me. I will do whatever it takes to get you to change your mind about us” the way he said it sounded like a promise, Steve nodded in agreement.

Bucky gave my leg a squeeze that I’m sure was supposed to be reassuring. He got up and made his way outside, Steve followed soon after.

That hadn’t gone the way I had expected it to.

 

A few days passed.  I barely saw Steve or Bucky, there was only a few times in passing.  They had left me alone aside from a few casual words here and there.

The days were boring and the nights were long.  I could only read so much and was quickly running out of ways to pass the time.  I despite their sudden lack of interest in me, I felt the need to be on guard all the time.  Their sudden withdrawal gave me an eerie feeling.

Days continued to pass and I became more and more stir-crazy.  There was nothing to take my mind off of the situation.  I had all the time in the world, but nothing to do.  They wouldn’t let me outside, even with a chaperone. “Too dangerous” they said. I was dying to get out of this house.

After another long day I made my way to bed.  At least when I slept I could get away from all of this.  I wrapped myself in the warm covers and let out a heavy sigh, this was the only relief I had. I felt a rush of contentment at I drifted to sleep.

 

I was jolted from my dream by the feeling of the bed shifting.  I sprung up to meet a pair of blue eyes in the dark.  I began to let out a yelp of surprise, but a hand covered my mouth muffling the sound. It was Bucky.  Unable to tell whether or not is was really Bucky or the Winter Soldier in my bed, I tried to shift away from him.  Backing away, my skull met the headboard with a loud thud, earning a small laugh from Bucky.  * _Great, now he’s mocking me_ *.

“Get out of here” I threatened.  He simply put his hands up in submission.  “I’m here to make you forgive me”, he played.  His voice didn’t have the same anger as the Winter Soldier’s, but this cocky attitude wasn’t something I had seen from Bucky. He reached for the covers and began to pull them down. “Cut it out, Bucky” I said through my teeth.

He crawled in between my legs and got to work removing my shorts.  He dragged them down along with my underwear and tossed them across the room.  His hands ventured up and pawed at my breasts. The coldness from his metal hand shocked my every time. “You are so soft” he smirked, planting a hot kiss on my lips.

He sat up and began to undo his belt buckle.  A well-known spark of panic struck my heart, “Bucky, please...”. “Don’t worry, Doll.  Tonight’s about you” he cooed. He left a sloppy trail of kisses and bites down my stomach and onto my thigh.  Latching onto my hips, he began to suck on my clit. My hips jerked at the sudden sensation.  I reached down and grabbed a handful of his hair, “Ah! W-wait, that’s-”.

He continued to suck and lick along my folds.  I struggled against his hold, but he had me completely locked in.  No matter which way I moved, he continued to work my pussy. It was such a strange sensation, the soft pressure of his lips compared to the rough scratching of his stubble along my legs.

He lifted his head for a moment, “You’re getting pretty wet”. I turned away, embarrassed that I was so open to him.  Taking two fingers he stroked along my cunt.  He easily slid into me knuckle deep and began to thrust. He started off slow, moving his hand in time with his mouth.

I let out a moan as he curled his fingers against my sweet spot. I could feel him smile against my skin. My muscles were starting to contract, already I was close. He removed his fingers, I silently whined at the loss, but he quickly inserted two more.  I felt a stretch, nothing painful to my surprise, the fullness felt amazing.  

His thrusts got faster, feeling that I was just about spent.  His lips left my clit and found their way back to my lips.  I could taste myself on him.  I jolted as a strong wave of pleasure hit me. I moaned into his kiss, he pulled away and asked “Do you want it?”

“Fuck you, Buc-Ah-h!” he curled his fingers again, cutting me off.  “You sure look like you want it, Doll.  Just tell me you want it” his words were cruel. I struggled with myself, I was so close, but I didn’t want to lose to him. He pressed in deeper, drawing out another whimper.

I felt myself clench around his hand, and let out a scream.  “Good girl” he praised as he continued to pump into me. I lost my voice for a moment, all I could do was look at him and take it. I took in a deep breath as my climax faded, but my legs continued to quiver.

“I will make you say it” he said, pressing a soft kiss on my forehead.  He didn’t do anything else. He just left the room with a cocky smile across his face.

I was falling further down the rabbit hole, pretty soon I wouldn’t be able to find my way out.


	4. Closing In

It was another couple of days before I saw Bucky again.  Steve was around, but he always made sure to give me my space. Again I was alone with nothing but my thoughts.

Bucky’s strange shift made me nervous, there were now _three_ sides of him I needed to keep track of. There was the Soldier who scared me, the victim who I pitied, and something new.  I couldn’t help but be drawn to the new figure emerging from Bucky’s internal struggle.  My curiosity put a sour taste in my mouth. As much as I tried to prevent it, there was a part of me what wanted to go deeper, to know more about Steve and Bucky.

I was beginning to normalize the situation.  As time went on I no longer felt a strong sense of resentment whenever they entered the room.  At the moment, there was no real danger.  I just accepted that these two were going to be a part of my life for a long time.

 

 

Over the following weeks my complacency got worse and worse.  Every so often, Bucky would approach me and lead me to the bed room, continuing his attempts to coerce a “yes” from me. He was never rough or violent. He never focused on his own pleasure, only mine; bit by bit he was chipping away at me.

I was ashamed with myself for my lack of resolve, but every time he came to me I was more willing to give myself up to him. 

I was startled from my thoughts by a familiar feeling of a hand tracing along my shoulder, it was Bucky. He looked down at me with a cocky smile and said, “Let’s go”.    With a hand on the small of my back, he ushered me towards the bedroom.  I noticed Steve emerge from the kitchen as we left, he looked happy.  I figured it was because he thought I was beginning to accept Bucky on my own, the realization that I might made me a little spiteful.  I batted Bucky’s hand away and continued to walk on my own.

Steve just smiled and took a seat on the couch.  He always stayed there when I was alone with Bucky.  I tried not to think about it, my embarrassment skyrocketed knowing that Steve was just outside.  Despite that, it was reassuring to know that he was still looking out for me.  The two of us had gotten used to this new Bucky, but neither of us could forget the danger of another relapse into the Winter Soldier.

Once inside the room I slumped down into the bed.  I just sat there and tried to look like I wasn’t enjoying the situation.  He sat down next to me and looked straight into my eyes.  Even though we had been so close to each other so many times, I couldn’t bring myself to look at him.  He grabbed my chin with a gentle firmness and propped my head up to look at him.  “Are we going to keep playing games today?” he purred. 

I glared back.  I hated it when he talked like that, it just made me frustrated and confused, I didn’t know how to answer him.

“That fine, I can wait a little longer” he played.  He reached his hand behind me to grab the back of my neck and pulled me into a kiss.  He pressed into me, forcing me to lay down against the bed. The bed sighed as he crawled on top of me, grabbing both sides of my face he continued to cover me with hot kisses. 

His hands felt their way down and started to pull at my shirt.  His cold hand snaked up and under my bra, making me let out a gasp at the sensation. He then moved further down to remove the skirt I had been wearing.  The air was cold, and being left in nothing but my bra and panties made me shiver.  He smiled again and said “Lets get you warmed up, Doll”.

Removing my bra he went to work on my breasts, covering them in wet kisses.  He bit down on my nipple making me yelp out in surprise, “Bucky!”.  He donned a big smile with my breast still in his mouth, tenderly sucking away the pain. 

His hand trailed down my stomach and started to play with my clit.  He moved in slow, light circles, I could feel the heat begin to pool between my legs, as he continued I struggled to keep still.  I wanted so badly to move against his hand, to make him press harder. I wanted to feel more.

My eyes fell shut and I let out a quiet moan.  Hearing this made him move faster, but not as fast as I wanted. He tucked his fingers into the side of my underwear and began to pull them down, absentmindedly I lifted my hips to help them off, a move that Bucky definitely noticed.  I was beginning to slip, little things like that proved it to Bucky as well as myself.

Now completely bare to him, he shifted positions.  Pushing me onto my side he laid down behind me.  He was pressing against my back, I had to prop myself up to keep from falling over. With his right arm, he scooped up my leg, lifting it to my side.  I felt another chill as the air brushed against me. His metal hand reached underneath my side and found my bare clit.  He resumed his painfully slow pace from before.

He had me completely locked in. As the pleasure began to rise my hips started to move on their own, I was desperate for just a little more friction. He pressed his head into the crook of my neck and started to suck, making sure to leave a mark.  I let out a louder moan, my head fell back offering more of myself to his relentless kisses.

My hips jerked suddenly to the feeling of his fingers entering me. From this angle, I could feel every rib along his metal hand trace against my clit each time he pumped into me. He made sure to drag his palm against me every single time.

My breathing was beginning to falter, as he sped up I thought I was going to melt into his hands.  Moan after moan was escaping my lips, I raised my hands in order to muffle the sound. I heard Bucky laugh behind me, “You don’t need to do that, Doll.  I want to hear you”. At this point his hand was moving so fast I could barely form a thought.  I was so close and all I wanted was for him to keep touching me.

I let out a whimper, my hips were beginning to buck frantically against his hand.  “That’s it, Doll.  Now, do you want it?” he breathed into my neck.  “Answer me” he growled. I was in such a state that I couldn’t get out a single word. 

To my surprise I nodded.

“You aren’t getting off that easy, I want to hear you say it.  Do you want it?” he smirked.  Between my constant moaning and panting, I wasn’t sure I could get the words out. All I could think about the rapidly approaching rush of pleasure.  “Say it or I’m going to stop” he threatened.

He hadn’t stopped before, but this was completely different.  He knew how badly I wanted it, I _had_ said yes in a way.  He had total control over me and he loved it.

As I struggled to collect my thoughts his hand pulled away from me, “Bucky, please” I whimpered.  “Oh, is there something you wanted to tell me, Doll?” he questioned playfully, spreading my folds with his middle and index fingers.

It was quiet for a moment. All we could hear was the sound of my breath.  I whispered “Bucky, Please.  I want it…”.  His fingers began to trace along folds again, “You want what?” he purred.  God I was so close. “A-ah! Bucky, I want you. Please!”.  He let out a deep growl and thrust his fingers back into me, picking up an even more rapid pace. 

 I seconds he had me over the edge. I screamed out in pleasure.  “Fuck, (y/n). That’s it, good girl” he reassured me. It felt good to give in to him, it felt safe.  He kept me in my climax as long as he could, sending pulse after pulse of pleasure rocketing through my body. “Bucky, ah! It’s too much” I pleaded.  My nerves were raw and aching, but I had never felt to content.

He flipped me over onto my back and kissed me, this time I kissed back.  He looked happy. I didn’t think that this mattered so much to him, I guess he really did _want_ me care for him. He crawled back on top of me and continued to lavish me with kisses, * _Who knew an ex-assassin would be so thorough with aftercare_ *.

“Ready for round two?” he questioned playfully.  My eyes widened in surprise, I wasn’t sure I could make it through another round, “Bucky, I don’t think I _can_ ”. He just placed a kiss on my cheek, “Don’t worry (y/n), I can take care of you”.  The way he said those lase few words made my heart flutter in my chest.  He could have asked me to do anything at that moment and I would have said yes without reservation.    Just like that, I lost any part of myself that wanted to get away from him. “Okay”, I whispered.

He planted another heavy kiss on my lips.  He quickly removed his shirt and then started on his pants.  He moved his way in between my legs and I felt an odd sense of anticipation.  He freed himself from his shorts and pumped himself.  I had forgotten how large he was.

“(Y/n), you are so beautiful” he cooed.  He lined himself up and started to rub himself against my folds, covering himself with my juices. Still recovering from my first orgasm I let out a moan.

He pulled back and pressed himself against my entrance. In one swift thrust, he pushed himself into me.  We let out a moan in unison, he made me feel so full.  I took a moment to adjust to his girth which he patently allowed before setting a steady pace. 

The room was filled with the sounds of moaning and skin against skin.  There wasn’t any more shame or embarrassment, we just wanted everything the other was able to give.  His hand started to trace my clit again, quickly building me up to another climax. I was still so sensitive that I wouldn’t last long against his brutal pace. “B-Bucky, you need to slow down.  I’m n-not going to make it that long!” I pleaded.

He panted out a laugh, “Sorry, (y/n). I don’t think I can do that”. The force of his body ramming into mine had me squirming beneath him. He let up on my clit, but that did little to slow the tight coil of heat that was building between my legs.

Being with him like this was so different from the first time.  Before, I spent all my will fighting what was happening, but now I soaked it all in.  I was happy being so close to him, I was happy seeing that I made him feel good too.

All of a sudden I felt myself snap. I threw my arms around his shoulders and pulled him in close, preparing myself for my second climax. White light filled my vision, turning me into a mewling mess.  I felt myself tighten around Bucky’s length. His hips staggered, letting out a low grunt as I continued to contract around him.

He reached to brace himself against the head board. Caught up in the moment, he missed and fell on top of me, causing the lamp next to us to hit the floor with a loud crash.   I yelped out in surprise at the sudden noise “Bucky!”.

Hearing the crash, Steve burst into the room.  I let out another shriek in surprise.  The three of us looked like a deer in the headlights. Steve’s face turned bright red, “(y/n), um-are you alright? I heard a crash”.  Bucky and I looked at each other for a moment in surprise before he let out a deep bellied laugh.

I smiled at Steve, but noticing a large bulge in his pants brought me back to the reality of my position.  I moved to cover myself, al whole lot of good that would do… Bucky noticed as well and looked back at me with a dangerous look.  * _I don’t even want to know what’s on his mind_ *.

“I-I just wanted to make sure that everything was okay…” he mumbled.  His color was just getting worse, he moved to turn back through the door but Bucky stopped him.  “Steve! You don’t need to leave, we are just getting started”.  Our heads whipped to look at Bucky, what was he thinking?

I didn’t think it was possible for Steve to get any redder, but he did.  “Come over here” Bucky flirted, gesturing for Steve to approach. When Steve showed no signs of moving, Bucky got out of bed and guided Steve over. I was still laying on the bed recovering, I watched the two men make their way towards me. “Go ahead, touch her” Bucky prompted. Steve looked and Bucky then to me, “(Y/n) is that okay?” he asked quietly.  With a supportive nod from Bucky, I said “Y-yes, it’s okay”.

Steve pulled me towards the side-edge of the bed and started to move his hands along my body.  His hands were different; they were softer and more timid, but the firmness behind them was exactly like Bucky. “Kiss her” Bucky ordered.  Steve sucked along my neck, going over the marks that Bucky had left earlier.  When he kissed my lips it was so gentle I got lost in the moment.

While Steve continued to navigate my body, Bucky got to work on Steve’s clothes. Steve’s mouth left mine only for the time it took to free himself of his shirt.  Bucky moved on to Steve’s belt, leaving a trail of bites down his back.

I was embarrassed of how excited I was to have these two men around me, but anticipation soon took its place.  The two climbed into bed and set their attention towards me.  As overwhelming at it had been with just Bucky, having the extra pair of hands and lips grazing my body had me in a daze.

We moved around from one person the next, kissing, licking, and biting.  I only hesitated when I thought * _How am I going to handle two men at the same time? Are we taking turns?_ *.   

Bucky’s voice brought Steve and I out of our frenzy of kissing, “Here, Steve. Lay down”.  Steve did as he was told, “Okay, now (y/n), I want you on top of him” he commanded. I straddled Steve’s hips and guided him towards my entrance.  There were two pairs of hands on my hips, easing me down onto Steve’s cock. Bucky was behind me kissing my neck.  I whined at the feeling of him inside me, he was longer than Bucky and with all my weight pressing down, I could feel him deep inside me.

I let out another whimper when he started to move.  He was reaching so deep inside, after Steve had evened out his pace Bucky chimed in again, “Alright, stop here for a minute”. Steve shot Bucky an angry glair but obeyed.  “Lean over, (y/n)” he continued as he splayed a cold hand in between my shoulders, pressing me down until I was flat against Steve’s chest.   

My heart clenched when I felt Bucky take his place behind me.  I felt his tip brush against my pussy. I looked back at him with a worried look on my face, “B-Bucky, I’m not sure I can do this…”.  He planted a kiss on my mouth, “It’s okay, just relax”.  I was trying, but I just couldn’t believe that they could both fit inside me.

Bucky reached underneath me and began to play with my clit while Steve kissed me.  I felt a prick of pain when Bucky started to press forward, I gasped at the pressure. I felt so full with just one of them, how could I possible manage two? They continued to distract me from the feeling while Bucky entered me, with a final press they were both inside.

The three of us let out a moan in unison, then Bucky and Steve began to find their pace.  It started off sloppy, both of them were thrusting at their own pace, I couldn’t find a way to brace myself.  They seemed to notice me struggling, and slowed to match each other.  It was a completely different feeling, having both of them pull in and out together.  As they adjusted to each other’s rhythm, they began to pick up speed.

I didn’t try to hold back my voice.  My moaning became more and more frequent as I neared my third orgasm.  I could hear the two of them panting into my neck, kissing and biting at any piece of skin they could get a hold of.  “Bucky, Steve… A-ah! I’m so close” I moaned. I was praying that they were nearing their limits too, I don’t think I could keep this up much longer.

“(y/n), you’re so tight, God you feel good” Steve praised.  “You are doing so good, (y/n). Hold on a bit longer” Bucky added.  They began to lose time with each other, both were thrusting erratically. The sudden change in pace threw me over the edge.  My voice faltered and my hips began to spasm between their two solid bodies. My pussy tried to clench down, but there was nowhere to go, I was too full.

“Shit, that’s it. Right there (y/n)” Bucky moaned.  My climax was enough to push Steve into his own orgasm, he threw his arms around my waist and released his load deep inside my throbbing pussy.   Bucky followed a few thrusts after, pouring himself into me with a deep growl.

I could feel them twitching inside me.  That’s where they stayed for a moment while we returned from our highs.  Bucky moved first, I groaned when he pulled out.  Slowly, I eased myself off of Steve and began to make my way off the bed.  I was trying to hold their cum inside me until I reached the bathroom, that was not a mess I wanted to clean up.   

Before I could make it off the mattress a pair of strong arms gripped me and pulled me back into bed. With Steve’s arms a holding me in place, Bucky walked over to the bathroom and fetched a damp towel. “You aren’t leaving this bed for a while” he joked.

We cleaned each other off, the care that they showed me and each other was enough to win me over. With one man on either side of me they pressed in close.  The heat radiating off their bodies made me sleepy. 

I felt warm and protected.  I was reassured that they wanted and needed me just as much as I did them.


	5. Getting Your Hands Dirty

I woke to the shifting of bodies around me.  I was surprised that I managed to wake before either of them did, they were usually early risers. All I wanted to do was fall back asleep, I don’t think I had ever slept that well before.

Steve’s arms were still wrapped around me while Bucky had tossed a heavy arm over the two of us. There couldn’t have been a safer place than right here.  Between the two soldiers and wrapped tightly in blankets I felt a sudden need for air.  Their bodies combined made the bed feel like it was 100 degrees. I tried to worm my way out of bed without waking them.  The last thing I needed was to get drawn back in,  I don’t think I could have gotten back to sleep even if I wanted to.

Climbing out of bed took an eternity.  Every time I felt one of them move, I froze, not wanting to wake them.  As soon as they settled, I moved a little more until I was free.  Quietly I went to find a change of clothes.  After I dressed myself I made my way into the living room, stealing another glance at the sleeping pair.

Thinking back on the day before, I hadn’t eaten much.  My stomach let out an unhappy rumble and I set out to make some breakfast.  I thought about making enough for the three of us, but the two never really sat down for breakfast.  They were more of the “be home for dinner” type of men.  I suppose we all had our own work to do, but whatever they did kept them out all day.

I caught myself muddling in my domestic thoughts.  It seemed crazy to me that in just a few weeks, things could change so much. I thought about work, my friends, my family.  I wasn’t sure what they knew, or if they were worried about me.  I thought about asking Steve, but actually knowing might be worse.

I tried to distract myself from my gloomy thoughts through food. * _What to make?*_

Steve and Bucky always made sure there was enough food in the house to keep us all fed, living here was making me quite the cook.  It looked like we had a lot of eggs and bread, fried eggs and toast it would be.  I began setting up for my _extravagant_ meal, the eggs were cooking, bread was in the toaster, now it was a waiting game.

In the meantime, I began to work on some left over dishes that had been dropped in the sink the night before. Color flushed my cheeks when I thought of Bucky and Steve.  I released a sigh and went over the night in my head.  Hearing the floor creak I turned to find Bucky leaning against the doorway.  Still a little embarrassed over the events of last night I turned back quickly and continued to work on the dishes.  “Good morning” he cooed, sneaking up behind me.  He pressed his hips into my backside and placed his hands on my waist, “What are you up to?” he asked playfully. 

 I laughed, “Just making myself some breakfast. I wasn’t sure if you and Steve would want any”.  He started to kiss my neck, the feeling was so distracting.  “W-we have too much bread and eggs, the two of you need to start eating more of what you buy”.  He scoughed, “You should make French toast, Steve likes that”.  “Do you want some too?” I asked timidly.  “Of course, I’m famished” he purred planting another kiss onto my neck.  There was no way I could get anything done with him in here. “If you want anything to eat you need to leave me alone! I can’t cook with you in here, go get some fire wood or something...” I shooed him away.  He retreated with a smile on his face. 

Composing myself again, I set to work on breakfast for the three of us.  I don’t think that we had ever eaten a real meal together in our time here.  While I always did most of the cooking, until now I tried to avoid being in the same room as them as often as I could.  I was looking forward to sitting down with the two of them.

Preparation went fast, Bucky had already returned with more wood and was stoking the fire.  I couldn’t believe how cold it had gotten and how fast.  The smell and heat of the fire completed the classic look of the house.

I started to set the table, “Bucky, go get Steve” I chimed. He jumped up from the fire and made his way over to Steve who was _still_ sleeping. I jumped when I heard Bucky yell “WAKE UP, SOLDIER!”, followed by laughter from Bucky and bickering from Steve who didn’t appreciate his call to arms. Bucky emerged and took his place at the table with a wicked grin, Steve came out a minute later with a tired and grumpy look on his face.  “Good morning, Steve” I said, unable to hold the small laugh that followed.

“I hope Bucky wasn’t lying when he said you liked French toast, I had to use all the bread that was going stale”.  Steve’s expression softened when he looked at me, “No way, this is great” he praised. 

The three of us ate quietly.  The silence wasn’t bad, but I had so many questions I wanted to ask, I figured they could wait a little longer.

 

 

This was the beginning of our life together.  For the most part we continued on with our lives like normal people. I stopped asking about leaving the property, as much as I wanted to go out and see my family, being here was what I was used to now.  We all settled into our classic roles, I was becoming quite the homemaker. I think they liked that because it reminded them of where, when, they were from. This whole place was becoming more and more of a time capsule the longer we stayed, I didn’t mind, I liked being with them, apart from their at times overbearing protectiveness.

It had been about a month since the three of us had sex for the first time, that was when we really started _living_ together. Even after I expressed my desire to stay, they never let me out of the house, every so often I could venture out onto the balcony when the two of them where there to be on lookout.  I thought it was silly how careful they were, but thinking about their past and their enemies was enough to keep me from arguing.

 

 

 

Hearing a distant rumble, I looked out the window to see Steve coming down the driveway on his bike.  I was always happy to see them come home, I didn’t like not knowing where they were or what they were doing.  Bucky joined me for a moment at the window, I could tell he felt the same way that I did. Because we had to stay hidden, the work they did was brutal and often unsafe.

Steve walked through the door a sweaty, mud-covered mess.  He proceeded to make his way further into the house when I stopped him.  “Steve! Don’t you even think about coming into this house covered in mud!” I barked. “Aww, I don’t even get a kiss first?” he played, making his way over to me.  I immediately tried to retreat from his dirty hands “Steve, cut it out!” I laughed running away from him.  “C’mere!” he pursued and pulled me into a tight hug, planting a kiss on my lips.  “God, Steve you smell! And you got dirt in my mouth!”, he just laughed back at me. “Then you’d better help me change, (y/n)” he said, tossing me over his filthy shoulder leading us to the bed room.

“Bucky!”  he called, “We’ve got a very dirty girl on our hands here. I need you to come help me straighten her out!”.  I playfully slapped Steve’s shoulder, Bucky appeared behind us and followed into the room.

He plopped me down and made his way towards the bed. “I’m not kidding, Steve.  Those clothes are going anywhere near our bed” I said sternly.  “Yes ma’am” he responded, “Why don’t you give me a hand?”. I gave him another kiss, and started removing the layers of soiled clothes piece by piece until his chest was bare. He kicked off his shoes as I moved to his pants which met the floor with a slump. 

I could see his half hard member beginning to strain against his shorts.  I looked up at him as I curled my fingers around his waistband and pulled them down.  I kneeled at his feet and started to pump him with my hand.  I could feel his cock getting harder with each pass, making his hips rock ever so slightly.  I licked my lips before taking his tip into my mouth, slowly easing my way down as far as I could.  Steve grabbed a handful of my hair, guiding my mouth up and down his cock, I placed my hands on his hips to brace myself. I started to pick up my rhythm, the feeling of Steve’s fingers tightening around my hair encouraged me to move on.

I was interrupted by Bucky tugging at my clothes.  I did my best to keep working Steve as Bucky started to paw at my breasts.  I pulled away from Steve and licked him from base to tip before taking him back into my mouth.  I could hear Bucky removing his own clothes, eager to join us.  He returned and planted a hard spank on my ass, I moaned into Steve’s cock causing him to jerk further into my mouth.  “When am I going to get a turn?” he played. 

Steve released my hair and brought me to my feet.   We made our way to the bed where Bucky sat down, I positioned myself between his legs and stroked his already solid dick.  I sucked and pumped at the same time, earning a sweet moan.  They could both be so needy, even after a month, it was hard to give equal attention to both.

I felt a strong pair of hands lift my hips from their kneeling position.  I was on my hands and knees when Steve moved himself behind me.  After adjusting to the position I brought my attention back to Bucky, tracing my tongue lightly along his shaft.  He pushed himself back into the warmth of my mouth, bobbing my head slowly.

Steve entered me suddenly from behind, unprepared for the sudden force I took in more of Bucky than I could manage. I gagged around his cock, but he seemed to like it.  With his hand against the back of my neck he repeatedly pressed deep into the back of my throat.  Between the two I was a sloppy sight. You could hear how wet I was from the sound of Steve’s thrusts, and Bucky’s rough blowjob left a mixture of spit and pre-cum all over my lips. “Look at what a messy girl we have, Steve” Bucky growled, tucking a stray lock of hair behind my ear. Steve let out a breathy laugh, too focused on his thrusts to answer.

The two leaned over me and planted a rough kiss on each other.  Steve pressed in so deep I let out a long groan at the feeling.  Bucky’s hips started to jerk into my mouth.  I went back to using my hand and my mouth before he groaned deep in his throat.  Grabbing me by my hair he pulled me back and stroked himself. “Fuck!” he cursed, covering my chest and mouth with cum. 

He fell back onto the bed and panted for a moment.  “There you go, (y/n). That’s it” Steve complimented.  He was close too, I could feel his pace starting to quicken.  “(y/n) I want to look at you, sit with Buck” Steve ordered.  He positioned me so that I was in Bucky’s lap, my back against his chest. Steve pushed back into me, and looked for a moment at the mess that was left across my chest.  Bucky wrapped his arm around me, holding me still for Steve.  With his free hand he found my clit and pressed rough circles around it.  My hips twitched, “Ah!  That feels so good” I moaned.

Steve pressed his head into my neck and began to suck, I let out another moan as my heat continued to build.  I placed a hand on Steve’s shoulder for support, “Ooh, S-Steve, please.  I’m so close, p-please, Bucky”.  The two of them sped up, low grunts were falling from Steve’s lips. I was glad to have Bucky’s support behind me, I don’t think I could have held up against the force of Steve’s thrusts on my own.

“Steve, a-ah!” I frantically tried to grind my hips against Steve and Bucky.  A rush of pleasure filled my body, I whimpered as I clenched around Steve, pushing him into his own climax.  He pressed into me so deeply that he forced Bucky and I all the way onto the bed. I could feel his cum release inside me I let out another moan. He pressed soft kisses on me and Bucky before getting up and making his way to the bathroom.

“I’m going to be out of the house early tomorrow” he called back at us, “I shouldn’t be gone too long though”.   We both gave him a worried look, I hated it when he worked that early.

We quickly got ready for bed and settled in for the night in our usual position.  I fell asleep so quickly like this, it was so easy to forget about everything that wasn’t them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for all the messages and kudos, I really love hearing from you guys! sorry this chapter was a little short.


	6. One Step Forward

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Warning: This chapter does contain some gore.

The next morning I was the last to wake up.  Steve had left at some ungodly hour leaving Bucky and I to sleep into the morning.  Sometime around seven, I was forced from my dreams by a tight squeeze around my waist, “You awake, (y/n)?” Bucky croaked.  I pretended I was still asleep.  He gave me a playful shake, “(Y/n)?” he cooed, beginning to suck on the back of my neck.  “God, Bucky, it’s too early” I laughed “Go back to sleep”.  I tried to shift deeper into the mattress, but he had another idea.

“I’m not letting you get away that easily” he said climbing on top of me.  “I don’t get you to myself that often, I’m gonna make use of it” he smiled.  I laughed again, the two of them could be so jealous. 

He bent down and started to cover me with deep kisses. I was easily overwhelmed by the feeling, wrapping my arms around his broad shoulders I kissed back.  I hadn’t realized before how long it had been since it was just me and him.  I didn’t mind when Steve was there, I greatly enjoyed it and so did Bucky, but here, just the two of us felt right.  I couldn’t deny that I had strong feelings towards the both of them, but there was something different about Bucky.  I had all but forgotten about how things started, maybe it was because I knew that the person I first met wasn’t _really_ him.  I scolded myself for not persevering, but when I was with him I didn’t really care.

He pressed his way in between my legs and started to grind himself on me. I could feel myself getting wet, eagerly I lifted my hips into his, hoping to gain some pressure on my clit. I could feel his length starting to grow, I tugged at his shirt desperate for more skin.  We started to peel off the little clothes we had on and discard them across the room. 

Completely bare, I pushed him back and began to work his cock.  I took him into my mouth and earned a hitched moan. My head moved up and down, each time my tongue lingered on his tip.  I did my best to look at him, I loved seeing him when he felt good.  His eyes locked with mine, with both hands cupping my face, he lifted me into another deep kiss.  I twisted my hand up and down his shaft.  He started to move down my neck, leaving little marks along the way. 

I pulled away and returned my soft, plump lips to his cock.  He dragged his dull nails down my back, giving my ass a tight squeeze. His hand followed the curve of my hip all the day down my thigh.  He moved inward suddenly, tracing his fingers along my soaking folds. I sighed at the feeling of his hand on me, I pressed myself into him. 

With his fingers lubricated, he pushed inside me.  He would scissor me until I had adjusted then quickly add another finger, beginning again.  I let out a moan with his cock deep in my mouth, sending a shiver up his spine, “You’re so wet.  God, I just want to get inside of you” he purred. I gave him a look of agreement, he pushed me onto my back and regained his earlier position.

With one forceful thrust he was inside, his cock was still slick with my spit and met no resistance.  It was a stretch every time, even with the foreplay I could feel my walls struggling to accommodate his girth.  

He didn’t start out slowly like he usually did, right out of the gate his pace was fast, deep, and brutal to keep up with.  I was a little surprised, usually he started off the same, but then it occurred to me that Steve wasn’t here.  I blushed realizing that during the completely overwhelming sex the three of us had been having for the past month, they had been holding back.  I guess he thought that I could handle his needs since it was just him. 

All too soon that familiar knot was building, I was thankful that he had decided to leave my clit alone for the moment.  He pressed all his weight into each thrust, hitting my sweet spot every time.  I couldn’t hold back my moans any longer, “Ah! Bucky, w-what’s gotten in to you?” I joked. He laughed, “I told ya (y/n), I’m not letting this go to waste.  I’m going to give you everything you can take” those last words sounded like a promise.

I could feel my orgasm approaching fast, my walls started to flutter with anticipation.  He let out a deep growl and resumed his attack on my neck, I could feel the skin becoming raw which only added to my arousal. “Bucky, I’m too close. Ah! I’m so close, please” I whimpered, he wasn’t showing any usual signs of his own end. I worried how much more I could take at this pace.

He wrapped his arm around the small of my back and pulled me into his chest.  I latched my lips into his collar, anything to muffle the moans that kept escaping me.  His relentless pace gave me no chance to compose myself, I tried to think of any way to postpone my climax, but it was too little too late. 

I took in a sharp breath or air as my orgasm crashed through me. My head rolled back and I let out a weak scream, Bucky took advantage of the opportunity and attached his lips to a fresh piece of skin. He continued to pound into me, drawing out my climax. I couldn’t even think straight it felt so good, caught up in the moment, I whimpered “A-ah, Bucky! Bucky, I-I love you”.  He stopped dead in his tracks and just looked at me.  It took a moment for me to realize what I said, * _Oh, God.  Did I actually just say that I loved him, during sex?  How cliché is that!?_ *.

He let me down into the bed without saying a word.  I had never felt so embarrassed, I reached my hands up and covered my face, turning away from him.  I frantically tried to save myself “I-I didn’t mean… I don’t… I-” I lost my voice, unsure of what else to do. * _Hadn’t this been the plan? But now it looks like he is trying to find a polite way to reject me_ *.  He gave me a guilty look, after all of this I had managed to mess it up.  I could feel tears start to prick my eyes.

I felt him shift away from me, _*Is he really going to leave right in the middle? Did I really mess up that bad?_ *. 

 “Say it again” he whispered.  * _What?_ *.  “Say it again” he repeated, this time more firmly.  I yelped a little in surprise when he pressed back in with his original vigor, working back to his grueling pace, “Please, (y/n). Say it again” he said a little defeated.  My heart welled up in my chest, I moaned at an aftershock from my climax.  “I-I love you” I answered weakly, still embarrassed.  “Say my name, (y/n)” he groaned.  Now, back at full speed, I felt like I couldn’t say a word.  I hadn’t recovered from my orgasm, and his thrusts were agonizing. “Bucky, I love you”  I managed to say.

“Again” he ordered, picking up his pace.  “B-Bucky, I love you. I love you” I moaned, his hips faltered and his breath hitched.  “Keep saying it, please” he groaned. The change in pace made me lose all control of my body, everything piled together was too much.  My heat was building and I didn’t think I could take another climax like this, I was completely shattered. “Say it” he commanded again, all I could do was obey.  I repeated those words over and over again, clinging to his solid form as my only support.

“Bucky, I can’t go anymore... I can’t...”  I cried, he kissed my swollen lips tenderly.  “I’ve got you, (y/n)” he said.  I released a silent scream and tightened around his length.  “(Y/n), that’s it. Just a bit more” he pounded into my quivering body a few more times before curling into me.  He moaned his release into my mouth, and with a couple of weak thrusts spilled himself into me.

After a moment he withdrew a little. He lowered his gaze not to look at me, “(Y/n)” he started “Did you mean it?”.  I was speechless, “How can you ask me that? Of course I meant it” I didn’t want to admit it, but the fact that he even asked hurt. The look he gave me made me want to cry, he looked so relieved. 

He pulled me into his arms, “I’m never going to let you go. I don’t care what I have to do, I won’t let you leave me” he promised. 

 

 

 

The events of the morning were enough to send the two of us back to sleep.  I felt a new sense of belonging here, I felt more committed to Bucky and to Steve.

I only managed to sleep for another hour before I became restless.  I thought about staying in bed, but I decided against it.  Carefully I left the bed leaving Bucky there still sleeping.  I never wanted to lose the picture of him lying there, he seemed so content.

I quietly shut the door behind me and took my usual path towards the kitchen, but something caught my eye.  I had barely noticed it, but the front door was open.  I surveyed the living-room, had someone entered?  After a minute of scanning the room for an intruder I dismissed the thought.  Cautiously I wandered towards the door.  With a timid hand I pushed it open and was met with a refreshing breeze.  I took in a deep breath of air, it would be an understatement to say that I wanted to go outside, but I worried about not seeing Steve. 

* _The doors in this house don’t just get unlocked, let alone left open.  Steve must be around here somewhere_ * I thought to myself.  I craned my head around the door frame looking for the familiar figure, but I couldn’t find him.  At this point my excitement had gotten the better of me, I took one step after the next off of the porch and onto the lawn. 

The ground was cold and wet, I hadn’t even noticed I wasn’t wearing any shoes, but I didn’t care.  It felt so good to walk around outside and have a moment alone with myself.  I kicked around in the tiny puddles near the driveway.  I felt like a little kid, but I didn’t know when I would have the chance to do something like this again.  I eagerly explored the perimeter of the house, taking a close look at all the places I had seen from the windows. 

As I made my way around the house for the third time, it started to rain.  The sparse fat drops were picking up until my clothes were thoroughly soaked.  I didn’t mind the rain, the cold, or the mud that was clumping between my toes, I just wanted to be there as long as I could.  There was nothing that could take me away from that moment, besides the sound of heavy footsteps coming from the house.

My head turned around to find Bucky in the doorway, half-dressed with only a pair of jeans hanging loosely on his hips.  I was a little disappointed that he was there, I knew he would want me to come inside, I was reluctant, but ready to come in.  Dragging my heels I started to walk towards him, but there was something wrong. He looked angry.

I knew that they didn’t want me outside alone, but there wasn’t any reason to get upset. Not wanting the situation to escalate, I hastened my pace.  I stopped once I got close enough to see his eyes.  They were dark and dilated, I could see his chest heave with every breath, something was not right.  I took a step back, unsure of what to do.

Without saying a word he move towards me.  I froze, I wanted to run, but I knew that would do no good.  A part of me felt stupid for worrying, Bucky wouldn’t hurt me, even if he was upset, but alarms were ringing in my head. 

In an instant he closed the distance between us. His hand seized my arm, I tried to pull away from him, but his grip was too tight.  Slowly he began to drag me back into the confines of the house.  “Bucky! Bucky, let go. You are hurting me” I pleaded, he took no notice. I had a feeling that I did not want to be in that house alone with him.  I was praying for Steve to return.

He pulled me inside and slammed the door shut.  “What the hell do you think you were doing out there?” he yelled, I felt a twinge of guilt, “I’m sorry, the door was open. I thought…”.  He scoughed, “You thought what?  It’s dangerous outside, I thought we were clear about that”.  I was shocked at how hurtful he was being, but my temper was getting the better of me.

“You can’t just keep me locked up in here! I’m not a pet!” I retorted.  “I can leave if I want to, you don’t scare me anymore.  You can’t keep treating me like a prisoner”.  His eyes grew dark, “That’s what you want? To leave” he growled.   I knew immediately that I had chosen the wrong words.  I tried to correct myself, “No, Bucky. I don’t _want_ to leave, I just can’t stay cooped up in here forever” I said sympathetically.  That did no good. “You want to leave…” he mumbled.

His hands were on me again, one gripped my wrist while the other found a place on the back of my neck.  Roughly, he dragged me towards our room.  Shutting the door loudly he cast me onto the floor, there was a pain in his face that I didn’t understand. I propped myself up against the corner of the bed, * _What is happening? Why is he acting like this?_ *.

He made his way over to me, grabbing a handful of hair he pressed me back into the floor.  I was flat on my stomach, he had pinned me down with one knee against the small of my back. “Bucky, what are you doing?” I questioned with fear in my voice.  “I’m not going to let you leave me” he said plainly. My stomach turned when I saw a silver flash of light in his hand.  A knife.

I started to struggle, “Bucky. Bucky please, stop” I cried.  A cold hand gripped my calf and stilled my movements,  “Stop! Stop, please!” I cried again and again, I felt a chill as a rush of pain raced up my leg. 

Bucky’s weight left my back and I immediately sat up and reached for my heel. I tried to patch the wounds with my hands which were soon covered in blood.  I was in total shock, my eyes darted from Bucky to the blood pooling at my feet.  What had he done... why?

He discarded the knife somewhere, and started back towards me.  I tried to move away, but didn’t make it very far, the pain was impossible to ignore.  He kneeled in front of me, caging me in with one arm on either side of me.  I didn’t know what to expect, even in the beginning he had never _hurt_ me, I sat there perfectly still with my mind racing. He looked remorseful, but that just confused me.  “What did you do!?”  I screamed at him, I battered his chest with my bloody fists.  “You wanted to wanted to leave me” he said it so genuinely, a rage started to build in my stomach. 

He wrapped his arms around my shoulders and pulled me in close, I struggled against him to no avail.  “I told you, I won’t let anything take you away from me… That includes you, (y/n)”, a new wave of tears started to fall, I had completely forgotten how broken he was.  The past month had been so good and safe, I let my guard down and this is what it cost me. I felt heart broken, the same promise that just a few hours ago made me so happy now drove a pit of fear into my chest. “I’m sorry I had to hurt you, but it’s okay. I can take care of you” it sounded like he meant to be reassuring, but my anger continued to flair. * _How can he be so twisted?_ *.

I continued to struggle against him, but his eyes were dull and unresponsive.  It was quiet for a moment, the silence was only broken by the sound of his fly being pulled down.  “Bucky, no.  Don’t you fucking dare!” I cried, but he remained unresponsive.  He shifted forward and pulled my legs apart, the pain made it impossible to resist, “I want to be close, like before” he said.  My back was against the side of the bed, there was nowhere for me to go, I was locked in.  He leaned into me and started to kiss my neck, “I’m sorry (y/n)” he said quietly. 

The radiating pain in my leg spurred me into action, I shoved him backwards enough to get a good look at him.  “Bucky, you need to stop” I ordered, but he didn’t seem to hear me, he leaned in again.  I thought about giving in and waiting out Steve’s return, but something told me that would be a dangerous choice to make.  I kept fighting, I squeezed my hand into tight fist and with all my strength and anger I landed a solid punch into the scarring on his left shoulder.  _That_ got a reaction. 

His eyes flashed, for a moment I thought I had him back, but that thought was quickly dismissed. “Stop trying to get away from me, Doll” he growled as he shifted closer.  His eyes lost the little sympathy that was left as a devious look crossed his face. He tore open my blouse and went to work removing the rest of my clothes. With his metal hand on my neck he started to tug at my skirt, lifting it out of the way. This was a face I recognized, the Winter Soldier had come back. 

He moved my panties to the side and pressed himself against my entrance, “Bucky, s-stop.  It hurts…”  I pleaded.  Again there was no response. “Come on, Doll.  Loosen up” he prodded.  In an abrupt movement he was inside and I felt a dull burn.  That was it, all I could do was wait until he was finished.  It didn’t feel good, I couldn’t tell what was going through his head.  The event didn’t last long before I felt him release inside me, “I won’t ever let you leave me, (y/n)” he whispered. 

He lifted me into his arms and placed me on the bed, making no further move to touch me.  I curled into myself, I tried to take up as little space as I could, I didn’t want to touch him or look at him.  I felt the bed give as he laid down next to me, neither of us said a word.

I could hear he breath even out, it seemed like he had gone back to sleep.  All I could do was wait for Steve and hope that he knew what to do.  I wondered who would be beside me he woke up, would it be Bucky or the Soldier?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One step forward, two steps back. Happy thanksgiving Y'all.  
> Poor reader cant catch a break!


	7. Chapter 7

For the next hour or so I laid on my side with my knees curled into my chest.  Bucky was still sleeping beside me, I tried not to move in fear of waking him. I hadn’t managed to make myself stop crying, my whole body felt raw and sore.

From the front door I heard a faint click, followed by the sound of footsteps, * _Steve?_ *.  I wanted to call out to him, to make sure that he came to me, but I stayed quiet.  I could hear him wandering around the house, no doubt he was looking for us. I could hear his steps moving closer, * _Please, Steve.  Just open the door_ *.

The steps stopped and the doorknob turned.  I saw Steve carefully peek his head inside, I suppose he didn’t want to wake us had we been sleeping.  He looked around meeting my eyes, I raised a finger to my lips letting him know to stay quiet.  A fresh wave of tears welled in my eyes, I was so relieved to see Steve, I just wanted him to get me out of here.

He quietly walked over, I saw his eyes widen when he noticed the blood seeping through the covers and on the floor.  His expression changed immediately from shock to rage.

He pulled the covers back slowly revealing my battered and bloodied body, his attention was focused on the deep cut on my heel.  Careful not to hurt me he lifted me into his arms and tucked me in a corner of the room, wrapping me in a fresh blanket.  “D-did he?” Steve questioned with pain in his voice.  I gave him a small nod, Steve gently took a hold of my leg, checking the severity of the wound.  His face was scrunched with hurt and confusion.

Without saying a word he stood up and marched towards Bucky. His voice boomed, waking Bucky with a start “What the fuck did you do to her!?”.  He raised Bucky from the bed and pushed him across the room.  “What is wrong with you!?” Steve jabbed, pushing Bucky further away from me.  There was a look of confusion on Bucky’s face, the Winter Soldier had simply passed through leaving _him_ to pick up the pieces.

Bucky’s unresponsiveness just added to Steve’s anger.  He forced the still confused Bucky into the living room where he continued his assault. I couldn’t see anything, but the sounds of fighting broke out. I could hear connecting punches, shouting, and the screeching of furniture as it was pushed around through the conflict. 

Bucky’s voice emerged “Steve? What’s going on, what’s gotten into you?” he questioned innocently.  “What’s gotten into _me_!?  Look at yourself, you are covered in blood! (Y/n)’s blood!” Steve croaked out, he sounded just as heartbroken as I was. 

I guess Bucky hadn’t even noticed the state he was in, I heard him release a sharp breath when his looked at the state he was in.  “(Y/n)?” he called out weakly, I couldn’t bring myself to answer.  “Come take a look at what _you_ did, Bucky” Steve rasped, I listened to a heavy pair of steps move back to the bedroom. Steve entered and called to Bucky, “Get over here, look at what you did”. Steve had already made his way to my side by the time Bucky entered the room.

Bucky kept his gaze low, he wouldn’t look at me or Steve.  “I said **_look_** ” Steve commanded.  I pulled the blanket higher over my shaking form, I didn’t want either of them to see me like this.  Steve roughly grabbed a corner of the blanket and tugged it away from me, exposing my body to Bucky.  The bruises and marks had begun to change from blue to a deep purple, the blood on my legs and hands had darkened as it begun to dry.  “Steve, please” I said as I reached for the covers he had taken from me. “He needs to see, he needs to know what he did” Steve said as he crouched to comfort me.  I wrapped my arms around him and sobbed into his shoulder.

Bucky didn’t say anything, but he moved towards us.  “You don’t come anywhere near her” Steve ordered, Bucky winced at the words.  “Steve, I-I don’t know what happened” Bucky pleaded, it tore me apart because I knew that _he_ didn’t do it, but the fear I felt when I looked at him was too real to ignore.  “Steve… (Y/n), Please… I’m sorry” he took another step towards us and was met with a glare I had never seen from Steve.  In that moment I honestly believed that Steve could, and would, really hurt him. “I said keep back!” Steve’s voice boomed. 

Once again Steve picked me up in his arms and held me close to his chest.  I could feel his heart racing, there was an added pain because I knew he was probably blaming himself for what happened.  With his eyes on Bucky, he carried me into the living room and sat me gently on the couch re-securing the blanket around me.

He gave my cheek a soft peck and said, “I’m sorry I let this happen to you”.  I wanted to reject his apology, it wasn’t his fault, but at the moment, his comfort was all I had. “Stay here, I’m going to get you some clean clothes” he said, brushing a thumb on my cheek. I didn’t want him to walk away, but there was no way I would be able to do anything for myself for a little while at least.  Steve reemerged with some loose fitting clothes and carefully helped me dress myself, the shorts were particularly difficult; every move of my leg was met with a sharp prick of pain.

The next task was to wash the blood from my legs.  With a warm cloth he started to wipe away the superficial evidence, the cut itself would need much more care. “Steve” I peeped, “Steve, you know this wasn’t your fault, right?”, his eyes didn’t move from my leg.

It felt like it took forever to get all the blood off, just because Steve didn’t want to risk hurting me. The silence was agonizing.

“(Y/n), we’ve got to clean these out and get you some stitches.  It’s going to hurt” he frowned. With the blood gone the severity of the gash was apparent, it was a deep wound that would take a long time to heal. 

I tried to prepare myself for the pain that was to come. Steve took a moment to collect the necessary tools for the small operation, he returned with alcohol, string, and a needle.  I felt my body tense, but there was no way around it. 

“Lay down on your side” Steve said, gently pressing me into the couch.  I gripped onto a pillow for support while he started to tend to my leg.  I jumped a little feeling his hand on my calf, I muffled a yelp when the alcohol poured over the wound. The burning alone was enough to make me squirm.  Wiping away the excess, Steve proceeded to the stitches.

As much as the cut itself hurt, the never ending stitches were driving me into a frenzy. I noticed Bucky timidly emerge from the room before I buried my face into the pillow.  This whole thing was too confusing, I knew who I _wanted_ to blame, but was I right?

I was crying uncontrollably, every so often I would look up to see the horrified look on Bucky’s face, but he never met my eyes.

After a while, the pain stopped growing.  With a sigh, Steve lifted himself from my side and began to wash the blood from his hands. It seemed like he was trying to ignore Bucky’s presence in the room.  He was so tense, I’m sure it was taking all he had not to slam Bucky into a wall.

I was beginning to recover from the pain.  I lifted myself into a sitting position, craning my neck to get a look at my leg.

Steve sat down at my feet, placing his hands lightly on my thighs.  The look he gave me was enough to make me want to cry again, but I wouldn’t let myself.  “(Y/n), how did this happen?” Steve asked, breaking the silence.

It took me a moment to begin talking.  This was the first time that I really had the chance to process the insanity of what just happened.  Slowly, but surely I began to explain the events beginning with the door being left open.

There was another long silence before Steve said anything, “It really was my fault…”.  I tried to reassure him, “Steve, you weren’t even here.  I should have known better than to go outside by myself”.  “I left the door open, (y/n).  I wasn’t thinking, things had been going so well. I never thought that Bucky could…” he cut himself off.

“I never should have brought you here” he whispered.  I cupped his face in my hands and pressed a light kiss into his forehead. I felt him lean into my touch.  He wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled himself into my bosom.

It felt good to have him there.  I didn’t want to be alone.

I wanted to feel the same closeness that the three of us had shared.  I held onto him as tightly as I could. 

I looked up for a moment, Bucky was still propped up in a corner of the living room refusing to look at me. His expression kept changing. He was a mixture of confusion, fear, remorse, anger, and disgust. I could tell that he was struggling to compose himself. After another minute he left the house, it would be good for him to be alone.  We all needed time to process what had happened.

Steve lifted his gaze to mine.  I don’t know where the feeling came from, but I just wanted to make sure he knew this wasn’t his fault, that I didn’t blame him. I held his face again and planted a kiss on his lips.  I must have seemed more urgent that I intended, because he pulled back with a look of surprise on his face. 

 He grabbed my hands and held them tightly, “(Y/n), what are you doing?”.

I wasn’t sure how to answer him, “I, uh… I don’t know, it just felt right”.  I moved to kiss him again, this time he kissed me back.  I guess he wasn’t used to me initiating anything, with their sex drive, I never needed to.

We were confirmed by each other’s touch. We had both lost a friend in that moment, all we had for now was each other. The feeling of his hands moving cautiously over my body made me feel warm. It was like he was trying to brush the pain away. I did my best to return his support.  All I wanted to do was to make his feel the same security that he gave me.

The three of us had become so close since I was brought here.  It was hard to imagine a life without Bucky, but he had crossed the line.  Now, Steve and I had to find out if this could be repaired.  For the moment, neither of us were sure.

Steve and I stayed on the couch for the rest of the afternoon, just holding each other.  There wasn’t much said, we remained quiet, thinking about what to do when Bucky returned.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I cant believe it took me this long to update, sorry! The past month has been one crazy nightmare, but things should be more consistent at least for a little while!


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